What do I mean by this? I have a few embarrassing examples from my past, when someone has sincerely asked me for advice, and I’ve responded with some platitude like: “just be yourself” or “just do it”. I don’t know if this was my exact wording. Probably not (hopefully). But the point is that there was no connection between two people in this interaction. It was just a repetition of worn our phrases that did not really come from me, and which were not really addressed to the person I was talking to, with regard to the specific situation that we were discussing. There was no substance. No forethought and no present moment awareness. I may as well had said: “Grevjush brajafreo medanajal bahalk”. It would have been just as meaningful and helpful.
I don’t want to make this mistake again. I want real connection between real people. But authenticity is hard. As with so many other things, it comes down to awareness. To be able to take a step back and not just respond with the first thing that comes up. To really see and feel the person that we’re talking to. To allow the heart and the brain to work together in the conversations that we have with other people.
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