Taking steps in the right direction

I just realized that there are these little steps, that are not that difficult to take, that we can take every day, that are so small, that I fail to recognize them as steps. When I try to do everything at once, I inevitably fail, because the burden becomes to heavy. In many areas, I’ve been standing still for many years, trying to bang my head against the wall, punishing myself into “better” behavior and beating myself up because I’m not able to live up to my own standards. 

What I could have done instead, is take micro steps in my day to day life. If I would have done so, my growth would have probably involved much less pain, and I would in all likelihood have gotten much further, since I wouldn’t have had constant failures to deal with.

If I can choose sweets with less sugar and more nutrition, that’s a step in the right direction. If I can eat popcorn, or even just snacks with a little more protein in them, instead of potato chips, it’s a step in the right direction. If I can watch a movie that will give me a new perspective, or even just one that makes me happy, instead of just offering mindless entertainment, it’s a step in the right direction. 

I think that I’m going to give the concept of “baby-steps” a serious go!

Cleaning up my mess

Going through a spiritual awakening, I realize that whatever mess one has created while being unconscious, both inside and outside, but mainly inside, has to be cleaned up. All of it! No one will do it for me. And in my case, it’s a pretty big mess. Everything from a lousy spine due to bad posture and a body full of tensions due to suppressed emotions, to money issues, to habits such as being annoyed by little things, being cheap or talking too much. All of it!

Being okay with making mistakes

For most of my adult life, I’ve been swinging back and forth between hubris and feeling that I’m worthless. If I’ve made a mistake, I’ve more or less unconsciously assumed that I’m stupid. I’ve even, in spite of knowing that it isn’t so, unconsciously assumed that I’m the only person in the world that makes the kinds of mistakes that I make. It took a long time for me to notice this. But knowing it, I think that I can being to let go and accept that I’m not perfect. That I don’t have to be. That I’m not better than others and that I therefore have the same right as they have to make mistakes.