The inner guidance

Photo by Marek Studzinski on Unsplash

Love or fear? Maybe it is this simple when push comes to shove.

I am noticing a more and more clear distinction between when I try to use my little rational mind to do and understand things and when I allow something higher within me to take over. When I act from my little ego, what my understanding and what comes out becomes pretty mediocre and boring. From this position, it becomes painfully obvious that there is nothing special about me and that the world is full of people that are smarter and more capable than I am. 

But when I manage to set my ego aside, sometimes something magical comes out. I’m still pretty new to this, so it’s not always easy for me to discern whether this higher - dare I say God - works through me, and when it is little me that has a go at it again. 

As soon as there is an element of pride involved, or that I want others to see me a certain way, I lose this connection. I also lose it as soon as I’m not honest with myself, when I’m not present, or when I don’t accept the present moment. There is no escape from this. I can either act from “little me” and try to gratify little me’s petty wishes and desires, that have nothing to do with God’s will for me. And get nowhere. Or I can set little me aside and open up to God’s will. There is no getting away from this. This goes for everyone. Not just me. I can either do my best to be who God wants me to be and do what God wants me to do. And maybe, just maybe, there is something great waiting for me in the future. Or I can keep complaining that my life isn’t what I want it to be and try to make the world give me what I want and be sure to get nothing other than more of what I don’t want.